Yep. A "Wanna-be" ... that's me ... for real.
... pretending to be living the life I want to be living ... when actually ... it's simply on hold.
A month or so ago, I decided to declutter my house ... and my life. It's not the first time that I have had the notion to do that ... and I am sure it won't be the last. What's important is that a little progress is made each time.
So, this time I decided that I was going to sell all of the random stuff I have hanging around on ebay. At least one item a day is to be listed ... on average ... some days a whole bunch ... other days not.
It's been fun so far ... and so amazing what people actually buy!
Hamster wheel races ... if there was ever such an event ... I'd be a gold medalist. Why, I 'd probably set a world's record for the fastest pace ... while racing my heart out ... to nowhere.
Figured I didn't need that hamster wheel anymore. I had deliberately taken that the first step ... and walked away from the routine and mundane ... when I cleared out that office.
The hamster wheel.
It's been hanging out in the garage in a box of stuff from my old office ... that I have just now ... unpacked ... after a couple of years or so.
It was the very first item I listed on ebay. I was sure it would be one of those things that would sell quickly. Bargain priced it, after all. And technically, it's never been used ... only in a figurative fashion.
Metaphorically.
It didn't sell. Not the first time ... or any of the other three times I've put it out there. Imagine that.
And that's when I realized that ... I was pretending ... to be living the life I want to be living ... when actually I am still hanging out ... there ... stuck ... in the hamster wheel.
Sure, the view's a little different ... from time to time. I keep moving the little wheel around ... then run in place ... as if I am getting somewhere.
Truth is, I am really not ... getting anywhere.
... and I wonder ... is it better to be Avis, the second sled dog back ... with a never-changing view but covering ground ... actually going somewhere? Or to be the independent hamster ... in the stationery wheel ... with view changes based on random mobility ... heart pumping & legs racing ... yet still never getting anywhere?
A friend from my once-upon-a-time past posted a message to me on Facebook yesterday. Spunky ... outspoken ... always moving in a rhythm uniquely her own ... here's what she wrote:
It was so like her ... and it made me smile!
All of the different monkey dream interpretations wrap around the idea that you shouldn't take life too seriously. One says if you are a woman, dreaming of a monkey has something to do with a large, handsome man in your life. She has never taken life too seriously ... and that man ... well, he found her a few years back ...
No surprises there.
Still since I was the one who got BIT by the monkey in her dream ... seemed like a good idea to see what that means ...
Being bitten in a dream brings to a close emotions and fears about vulnerability from something threatening or unresolved. The trigger event is signified by what is doing the biting.
I had a vivid dream of my own ... that very same night ... it involved bleeding ... but not from a monkey bite ... here's what I discovered about it:
Your dream indicates that you are releasing your pent-up tension and worry. It signals an end to the difficult times and the beginning of relaxation.
Do the math. 1 + 1 = 2
The little bear has been speaking ... randomly ... & often this weekend: I love you THIS much ... the message never changes ... just the frequency.
I went to find this photo ... it used to be the wallpaper on my computer ... at work ... in the same office ... where the hamster wheel taunted me ... it taunted me, too.Hamsters gone wild ... now that's the life I want to be living!
... gotta run ... putting that hamster wheel out there ... again ... because, you see, I HAVE witnessed a preponderence of unusual monkey behavior ... recently ...
It's a call to action ...
Take down the walls ... change the scenery ... move forward instead of running in place ...
It's time to step out ... to be done talking about the adventure ... time to start living it ...
No. More. Hamster Wheel.
Not sure where I am going ... not in a hurry to get there ... it's the journey that matters ... after all ... not the destination.
(c) September 2011
True words about that hamster wheel.
ReplyDeleteI am still de-cluttering (going on 8 months). My clutter seems to lead to more clutter. And, in that sense, I feel like I am on that wheel.
In the immortal words of George Jetson, " Jane, stop this crazy thing!"