Saturday, June 19, 2010

Meanest Daddy On The Block!

Sir.

That's what we called him. Out of respect.

From a very early age our Dad taught us about respect. And how to be polite. Back in the day, we called those things "manners".

As children, we sat quietly. Talked only when we were spoken to. Helped carry in the packages. Or unload the car. Or set the table. Or mow the grass. Or whatever else we were asked to do.

Dinner was family time. Every night. As small children, there were no exceptions. Everyone at the table. Napkins in our laps. Chewing with our mouths closed. No reaching. Intelligent conversation about topics that were age appropriate. Silence taking the place of mindless chatter and gossip.

We called him...as well as other grown-up men..."Sir". The ladies, of course, were "M'am".

We knew the value of "Please" and "Thank You". And we were reminded to use them....always.

That's not to say my Dad was a harsh taskmaster. He wasn't. There was lots & lots of "Daddy" time.

He would get on the floor and rough house with us as small children. My dad loved silly jokes. He took us out in the boat....taught us to water ski at a very young age...and encouraged us to try new things....to learn something everyday....to always use our minds....to problem solve....be creative.

Competitiveness was rewarded. Always play to win. Don't cheat. Lose with grace. Acknowledge a worthy adversary. These traits & skills were developed through no-holds-bar games of Spit-N-Cuss, Gin Rummy, Spades & Hearts that started as early as we could hold the cards. And, yes, we had to shuffle for ourselves.

From time to time, as all children do....we messed up. Maybe we didn't do our chores. And it's highly possible that as we grew past the toddler age, that we "shared our opinion" a little too boldly. He called it "talking back".

Never seemed fair, really, since he was always wanting us to use our minds & think for ourselves. I'm just saying....

Other times, we simply didn't MIND. Just like all kids.

We listened....maybe even heard the instructions....then took off and did something entirely different. Sometimes the ensuing adventure was fun & interesting enough to offset the punishment. Sometimes not.

As children, the law was laid down in one simple sentence.

FIND YOURSELF A CORNER.

This was extremely harsh. Usually a punishment that was far too severe for whatever the infraction. At least it seemed that way to us.

We were bright, gregarious children who enjoyed lively conversation....and attention. Being told to remove ourselves from whatever activity or conversation was taking place was devastating.

Of course, from the grown-up standpoint it was brilliant. A non-violent punishment that could be doled out quietly & effectively....no matter where we were at the time.

It seemed that everywhere had at least one corner!

My oldest brother often found himself in the corner. At least that's how the story goes.

And on one such occasion, he found himself nose-to-the wall in the corner....fuming....Dennis The Menace style...

And when my Dad came to check on him, it went something like this:

Are you sorry for what you did, son?
Yes, Sir.

Are you ready to come out of the corner?
Yes, Sir.

Do you have anything to say for yourself?
Yes, Sir. You're the MEANEST Daddy on the block!

That story had been told & retold over the years as my brothers & I have moved from childhood to teenager to adult to parenthood. It is always followed with a lot of laughter and fond memories of a Daddy who loved us....enough....to correct us when we were wrong....to raise us up....right!

Respect. Courtesy. Responsibility. Manners. Honesty.

Missing the mark in one of those areas was generally what landed us in the corner. And overtime, we learned the lessons that my Dad was determined to teach us.

Life kessons that laid the foundation...set the bar high....allowing us to pass through each stage of life with confidence....believing in who we were as individuals....knowing that anything's possible...

Thanks, Dad....uh, I mean....Sir....

....for being the MEANEST DADDY ON THE BLOCK!


(c) Mary Jane Sawyer, June 2010
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