Odds ...

It is estimated that there are 400 million doves on the planet ...it's a number that's often associated with abundance of stars in the night sky.

And one was waiting patiently for me ... to return home ... on Monday.

It sat totally still ... calmly & deliberately it stared me down ... as if it had an important message to share ... and I was reminded of the prompting weeks ago ... to pay attention to the birds. (For The Birds...)

It didn't even flinch ... when I pulled out my camera, opened the car door and stepped closer ... for the picture.

Odd ... that one was sitting in my yard ... basking in the 110 degree heat.  Doves are most commonly thought of as winter birds.  And odder still was the fact that it was alone.

It was an intense encounter ... between the dove and me ... and it left me wondering ... what to make of it.  So naturally, I did a little research.

When a dove appears there will be messages & opportunities for growth.

That's the first thing I found as I dug around.  I am always keen on messages ... and I was pretty sure that the dove sighting itself was a message of some significance.

As for opportunities for growth ... well, that generally means more challenges ahead.  And with my purpose for the week already firmly set ... that really wasn't too much of a surprise.

Doves hold the energy of promise.

I have been tired ... more like exhausted ... so much of the time lately.  The energy of promise sounds wonderful and refreshing.

That passage went on to say that when our inner turmoil is cleared, the possibility of good fortune awaits us and healing on all levels is paramount.

All good stuff. Healing ... on all levels ... seems to be taking such a very long time.

When a dove makes an appearance, one often finds unexpected, unseen support & assistance comes when it is most needed.

The week has been spent trying to unravel the morass of Jessi's Medicaid situation.  Actually, it's really pretty straightforward and clear ... yet all tangled up in conflicting interpretations of one simple word ... that reads one way in the federal law ... and is defined another way in the Arkansas policy.

The word is ... receive.

I am told that it is the first time anyone has come forward with this specific complication ... ever ... that somehow our situation is rare & unique.  Imagine that.

Actually ... it's not so uncommon ..  I continue to argue ... or there would not be a couple of clear & specific provisions lined out in the federal law to alleviate the confusion ... in situations like ours ...

And once again the interpretation factor comes into play.   What does it actually mean to ... receive ... that continues to be the question.

The thought of unexpected support & assistance is comforting.  And as the week unfolded, it became apparent to me that some behind the scenes activity is taking place as each day ended with tentative steps forward ... and ... no whammies!

When a dove appears ... prominently ... it signifies great change ... possibly even relocation to a new home.

Pretty sure that this appearance was a prominent one ... it was definitely noticeable.  Big solo dove ... sunbathing ... in front of the house.  And relocations ... and new homes ... have been the at the forefront of activities over here in my life ... for quite some time.

Sometimes a dove sighting is a forewarning of a death ... either physically or symbolicly ... and while it may bring grief, there is also a sense of relief & gratitude that suffering has finally ended ... and that peace will soon be at hand.

Pretty sure there is a message of symbolic death ... for me.  Once the ravel is untangled ... life as I know it will be undergoing a radical change.  All good ... but a symbolic death, for sure ... as we all step into the reality of what's coming next.

And the week, seemed to be full of physical deaths in families belonging to my friends.  Sure hope that peace will flow over on to them as well.

Another common meaning of a dove on the horizon deals with relationships.  A new relationship may begin ... or an old one rekindled.  That made me smile.

Sometimes I get a little myopic ... and there's that pesky friendship ... that continues to perplex and frustrate me ... lurking around the fringes of my life.  Not sure if it just vanished into thin air ... or is simply on hold ... once again.

When I ran across the idea of a rekindled relationship ... I secretly hoped for that one.

By the end of the week, I discovered that a very special NEW relationship was bursting forth ... spontaneously and unsolicited.  It's with a whole family ... of beautiful souls ... fun & interesting ... and I am positive that we are all going to be blessed ... from the friendship ... in the days ahead.

The essence of the dove ... appearing in one's life ... is that life is about to become much more peaceful & satisfying ... on all levels. And that one should let go of what has passed ... and be open to the promise of the future.

Hard not to like ... all of that.

Immediately following the bird's departure, I posted the picture on Facebook ... looking for identification.  I wasn't familiar with it ... and had never seen one like it in my yard before.  I thought it might be
a pigeon ... and sure enough, I discovered that doves are often mistaken for pigeons.
So I didn't feel totally bird-illiterate.

My friends, of course, came through quickly ... letting me know it was a dove.  And, quite possibly,
dinner ... depending on whether one was a hunter or not.

... and who knew there were so many types of doves?

It was thought to be a mourning dove by some.  One friend offered up a Ring Neck Dove ... that came up from Cuba ... followed by the observation that there was "no limit" on them in season.  And an older & wiser friend tagged it as an Eurasian Collared Dove ... that is known to range in the southern states from Texas to Florida.  He pointed out that the Ring Neck Dove doesn't come from Cuba ... but from Africa ... with the only known stateside flock being found in Alaska.

So I went looking for some pictures ... because ... I wanted a positive identification.

Photo evidence confirmed that it was the rarer ... Ring Neck Dove. And that it is NOT common in the United States. And upon researching the specifics of the Ring Neck Dove ... it is found that some camps believe it is a domesticated version of the Eurasian Collared Dove family ... others claim it as a branch of the African Collared Dove genealogy.  Obviously, there's a lot of native pride amongst doves.

The Ring Neck Dove is commonly referred to as the Barbary Dove.  And in some readings, it was also referred to as the Laughing Dove.

Cool.  The bird that was laying in wait .. for  me ... on a hot summer afternoon ... was laughing.

Once I had identified the origins and name of MY dove ... the findings became more interesting ... personal ... and powerful.

The dove has long been held as a symbol of peace.

According to the biblical account of the flood, Noah had sent out a raven first, which didn’t come back and then a week later, sent a dove that returned with an olive branch in its beak, which was a sign of land and of the peace that was to come.

In the Bible account, it was a dove that landed on Jesus when baptized by John the Baptist.  “At that moment heaven was opened and the Spirit of God came down in the form of a dove and landed on Jesus. And a voice from heaven spoke and said, ‘This is My beloved, in whom I am so pleased with!’ (Matthew 3:16-17).”

The Ring Neck Dove ... or the Barbary Dove ... is believed to be the dove ... of the Bible.  And the meaning associated with MY specific dove ... on page after page ... was always the same:

An appearance of the Barbary (Ring Neck) Dove is an encounter with the Holy Spirit.

Even as I write this .... days after the actual interaction ... with the dove ... and it's deliberate, steady gaze ... I become overwhelmed with emotions at the memory of the encounter.

Who am I?!?  That the Holy Spirit ... God ... would choose to reveal Himself to in such a
visible, physical fashion?!?

And what IS the message that He was so intently conveying?!?!

It's taken a few days ... and a lot of time spent talking ... out loud ... with no response from He who was listening.  Than in the wee hours of the morning ...  a couple of nights ago ... the laughter came ... the laughter of the Laughing Dove ...

"Who are you, MJ?!?  You are mine!" That's what He said. "Why in the world are you so surprised?!? I stop by ... all of the time."

Stunned ... I sat up and shook off the sleep ... all of my questions had been answered by my best friend, God, Creator of the Universe.

 ... and, silly as it seems,  all I could think was that the Native Americans believed that the sighting of a dove was a sign of rain to come.

"Is it going to rain?", I asked out loud.

The soft chuckle rolled into a side-splitting chortle ... and my Best Friend and I enjoyed a rip-snorting roll-on-the-floor ... laughing ... as the sound of thunder was heard in the distant ... followed by a flash of lightning.  Then for the first time ... in weeks and weeks ... the rain fell ... in my front yard.

Then the whisper came ... you see, the rain was an outward sign ... of the personal message that He came to deliver ... face-to-face ... to me ... because it was intimate ... and important ... He wanted to be sure that I was ... receiving ... it.

I love you ... THISSSS ... much!!! 

That's what God whispered in my ear.

The odds of a single dove ... waiting for you in your front yard ... are 1 in 400 million. About the same as your wish ... finding its star ... and coming true.

God has such a large sense of humor.  He laughs with me often.  And the Laughing Dove ... well, there's no doubt that the pun is intended.

Today ... the probability of 1 in 10 million ... somehow feels as if ... it's within reach.

Humbled, I am.  Amen.

www.lifelessons-mj.blogspot.com
(c) August 2012

 

A Clown Prince

A beautiful summer afternoon ... at the beach ...

I wandered into one of my favorite places ... to see one of my favorite people.

Sitting in the spot ... where he always sits ... when he's not wandering around the gallery regaling his guests with audacious stories of his adventures ... ahem ... or mis-adventures ...

... he was snoozing ... taking a little siesta.

I moved slowly and quietly from the door.  It gave me a chance to observe him unawares.   I had to smile.  The years have been so kind to him.

I was sure that he had noticed me ... that he was waiting to turn the joke on me ... to yell "Boo!" ... sending us both into a gales of laughter ...

Gently I leaned in ... placing a soft kiss on his cheek ... and whispered ...

 "If I kiss the frog, will he turn into a prince?"

Only slightly startled, he turned ... and when he realized it was me ... his eyes lit up and the most glorious smile one could ever imagine covered his face ...

He genuinely likes me.  I've always known that.
I imagine his "colors" changed ... when he saw that it was me.

An hour or so was spent ... catching up ... swapping stories.  It had been so long since our last visit that most of the sharing was brand new material ... at least it was to me.  Of course, each story was tinged with his personal wit & charm ...

I remembered you were gorgeous ... but I had forgotten how you take my breath away ...

Warms my heart ... every single time.

He showed me a few of his new pieces ... things he has created ... others that have been created for him.  All were special ... just like him.

Pretty much every visitor to Glenn Eure's Ghost Fleet Gallery ... leaves with a line drawing ... signed by the artist himself. If it doesn't read "Eure so beautiful" ... it's probably not an original.

I have a collection of his work.  Line drawings ... and water colors. Boats with my name on the back ... light houses ... monuments ... pirates ... whatever he has fancied ... over the years. 

"Have I shown you my clowns?"

One has to be careful with Glenn.  You never know if it's a trick question ... if he's setting you up for one of his silly jokes ... making you smile by design.

I reminded him that I have one of his earliest clown works ... painted on a paper tablecloth ... with a brush & paints from his dollar-store watercolor box that he carried in his pocket ...  it was done over lunch at one of our favorite places ...once upon a time ... a long time ago ...

Many an OBX visitor has a special Glenn Eure memory ... from lunch ... at the restaurant with the paper tablecloths.  After ordering, he always drew ... and sometimes painted ... an original something on the table covering.  Then with a flourish ... he would rip it out ... and breeze over to a neighboring table ... with a huge smile ... and an outrageous compliment ... for some unsuspecting lady.

Asking her name ... and where the party was from ... declaring her "absolutely gorgeous" ...  he would then personally sign the piece of art ...  turning an ordinary late lunch at the beach ... into a vacation highlight with his genuineness ... and his gift. 

Glenn Eure is ... a gift ... indeed.  And his friendship is a priceless treasure.

On the day he painted me that pair of clowns ... we had been talking about life ... and happiness ... and the masks people wear ... the face they present to the world. At the time, I don't think he knew we were talking about me.

He doodled as we chatted.  First, was a traditional male clown ... white faced with a painted smile. 
Then a beautiful lady clown ... with face paint ... but her smile was radiant & real.  She was happy ... inside and out ... and it showed ... through the make-up.

A happy ... beautiful ... clown.  That's a ... pretty ... rare thing.

He cut them out ... and created a very special piece with balloons ... matted & framed ... he gave it to me just before I left the beach.   He said the lady clown ... she was me.

It has hung where I can see it ... every day ... since then.  Reminding me ... that at least one person in the world ... loves me enough ... to always see me that way.

We both smiled at the story ... and the air was full ... of all those good vibes ... that show up when people who really care about each other ... spend some time together.

He's painted a lot of clowns since then.  There's a whole area in the gallery ... devoted to his clowns.  Bright, vivid colors ... people doing what they do ... hiding behind the painted on smiles.

"I want to show you my favorite clown, MaryJane!

Follow me!"

Of course, I should have seen it coming ... but I didn't.  I was so caught up in the moment ... in my good friend ... and his stories.

We turned the corner ... into the little clown nook.  He pointed to a frame where his favorite clown could be found ... and ... surprise, surprise ... it was me!

Set up ... as usual ... caught off guard by his playful spirit ... the mirror was reflecting me.  And on any day ... that you wander into the gallery ... his favorite clown ... will be YOU!

Laughing ... I turned to give him a big ole bear hug.  And I said a silent prayer ...
please God, don't ever let him change! 

All kidding aside ... he directed my eyes to the wall behind him ... where his clown collection was on display ... saying ...

"This one's my very favorite."

There on the canvas was another HAPPY clown ... so full of life ... and joy ...  the face paint was an enhancement ... rather than a mask.  Daring to ride a unicycle ... pedalin outside of the lines ... embracing the adventure ...
of what's coming next.

Shades of orange ... & brilliant turquoise blues ... exactly the same colors ... as the very rare pieces of beach glass ... that magically showed up along my path ...

Did I say that the painting ...  took my breath away?!?

Our visit was coming to a close ...
I had other places to go ... other old friends to see ... that day.  Showing me the clowns had been a bit of an afterthought ... we had had so much catching up to do ...

The moment was almost ... overlooked.

 Stepping a little closer ... for one last glimpse ... of the delightful clown ... the whisper came ...

"Take a look at the card, MJ ... the one with the painting's name ..."

Not really sure ... if the whisper came from Glenn ...
or from my best friend, God, Creator of the Universe ...

Doesn't really matter ...

 He has had such fun ... double-teaming me ... in unexpected places lately.

Pat, Glenn's amazing wife,  always names his works ... quietly adding a little bit of her beautiful spirit to each piece.   It's always been that way. She's the wind beneath his wings, after all.  

I glanced over at the little card ... with the name on it... everyone who knows me ... knows ... that I don't believe in coincidences ... words can't even begin to describe what happened next .

Time stood still ... tears ran down my face ... the emotions were overwhelming ... for seconds ... or maybe ... it was eternity ... I was aware of nothing but ... love.

Unconditional love.  Wrapping me up ... holding me close ... filling my heart ...washing over me with the easy natural rhythm of the ocean tide ... spilling out into the room ... rippling across the universe ...

Receiving ... that's the only word that comes close ...

It's a powerful word.  I looked it up, of course ... to be sure that I fully understood the feeling ...
and the message.

It means ... to come into possession of ... to act as a receptacle for ... to assimilate through the mind or the senses ... to permit to enter ... to welcome ...

I have thought about it ... a lot ... about the frog-kissing-prince encounter ... my clown prince, if you will ... and His gift to me.

I thought about it the rest of the week ... and on the long drive home ... and in the days that have followed since I returned  to life as I know it ... today.

It's taken me a couple of weeks to share this story ... re-living the moment still overwhelms me ...

My fairy tale is still unfolding. And in the quirky fairy tale of MJ ... princes are no where to be found.  

That's ok.  Princes are totally overrated in my book.  And riding off into the sunset ... with one on a white horse ... seems so predictable ... and ordinary.

What's coming next ... is just around the corner ... waiting to catch me by surprise ... to take my breath away ... much like the unicycle riding clown ...

He knows I need a little validation ... from time to time ... when I am on the verge of a BIG breakthrough of some sort ... and this one is more than a little BIG ... it's life-changing ...
it's really important that I get this ONE ...

Del was ready for me ...last Sunday ...

Receive God's love ... then live out of that love.

That's the starting point ... of love.

Love = Life

And earlier in the week  ... the little bear ... spontaneously re-affirmed ... out loud ... once again ...
that somehow ... my journey is one big love connection ...

  

I love you T-H-I-S-S-S-S much! 

That's what the little card said.  It's the name ... Pat gave .. to Glenn's favorite clown piece.  

That's what the little bear says ... every single time ... He speaks.

www.lifelessons-mj.blogspot.com
(c) July 2012

 

Run, MJ! Run!

How well are you running the race?

That was the subject line on the first email in my inbox  ... the day after ... I came clean ... about my hamster wheel ... habit.

Honest. I don't make this stuff up.  And even though I had 8 viewers ... and 2 watchers ... my hamster wheel ... received 0 bids ... on ebay this week ... again.

Maybe I should just give it away ...

I think I'm doing ok ... in the race running ... that is.  De-cluttering.  That's my goal.  It has been for more than a few weeks ... this time.  Ever since I got that direct message:

You're holding on to too many things, MJ.

When my best friend speaks that plainly & directly, I always listen!  No.  It's not

E.F. Hutton ... it's God, Creator of the Universe.  And, granted, He isn't just talking about things in my garage ... in my house ... in the little room off the sunporch.

Starting to clear out my house ... is just easier ... than clearing out my heart.

You see it's not the fact that I am holding on to ... too many things .. that's the problem.  It's the ... holding on ... to too many things.

Letting go is very hard for me.  Maybe that's because I have spent my entire adult life trying to make someplace feel like home.  So I gather up things that I think should be important ... and meaningful ... and I keep carrying 'em along with me.  Whereever I go. 

Thinking surely ... those things ... will make this place ... or that place ... feel like ... home. 

From time to time ... it's almost worked ... for a year or so ... then reality sets in.  You'd think I would have figured it out ... long before now ... 

Things don't make a home. 

And even though I am totally committed to cleaning out ... de-cluttering ... ridding myself of things that are no longer necessary to me ... I falter.

I pick it up.  Spend a little too long remembering where it came from .. why I have it ... & analyzing why I thought it needed to be brought along ... this time ...

Determined & cynical in my old age ... I am getting pretty good at cutting the cord ...

to a lot of things.  There is always that moment of hesitation, though, when I realize that there is still some life left in it ... it's just hard to give up something ... that still has

a little bit of life.

So this go round ... I am striving to be more practical.  Telling myself that, yes, the object in question still has value & purpose ... it has something to offer ... to someone ...  

just not to me ... not anymore.

Hanging on to things ... that may ... or may not ... have a little life left ... has been sucking the life ... right out of me ... for a very long time.

Thinking about things ... always leads to thinking about people.

I tend to hang on ... a little too long ... to friendships that have run their course ... too.

And ... to be perfectly honest ... at times it's the idea of a relationship ... that never actually unfolds ... the way I think it might ... the way I want it to ... that I allow to occupy a little too much space in my heart.

Imaginary relationships ... with real live people ... hopefully building my house of cards on whims ... silly, silly me.

It's a game I play with myself ... it seems safer ... than playing for real ... playing games with my head ... to guard my heart ... and MJ loses ... every single time.

Pretty sure those make-believes are part of the "too many" things I am holding on to ....

Seriously ... you'd think those would be the easiest to put out on the curb ... cuz there's no life in pipe dreams & "what ifs" ...

But they're not.

And after months of silence, the little bear has suddenly become Chatty Cathy.  Cheering me along the race course, maybe. 

I have written about the talking little bear ... a couple of times before.  He's special. 

Unpredictable ... unexplainable ...

The possibility of it being a battery that's running down has long been put to rest.  If it takes over a year & a half for those batteries to ... lose their charge ... then I am thinking I want some more batteries from where those came from ...

Some days ... it's simply a random outburst ... maybe 2 or 3 times in a 24 hour span.  Other times, it's a frenzy of chatter ... clusters of messages ... running together ... separated by pauses of varying lengths ... conversation-like.

It seems that the little bear talks to me more at night.  Sometimes it's constant ... all through the night.  There's meaning to the rhythm and timing of the messages.

I am sure of it.

The little bear only knows one sentence.

I love you THIS much !

Powerful ... important words.

For now, I am choosing to believe ... each time the little bear speaks ... it's because someone important to me ... is thinking about me ... maybe even allowing a little

MJ make-believe to come alive in their own hearts ...

You see, I'm pretty sure that I am not the only one who plays that mind-tricking-the-heart game ... especially in the still of the night ...

The little bear does occasionally speak to me during the day ... like first thing in the morning ... or when I am working from the house ... or when I return from the

busyness of my day.

Just more often ... in the dark ... in the wee hours ...

And I wonder ... does the little bear speak ... when no one's around to hear ?!? 

Triggered magically by someone's heartfelt thought ... words hanging in the air of an empty house ... waiting for me to hear them ... in my own heart ... upon my return.

The whole thing reminds me of a Twilight Zone episode.  Little bear proclaims ... outloud ... the desire of MaryJane's heart.  A baby-monitor ... of sorts ... channeling messages from a real live person in an imaginary relationship ... a fairy tale she is about to put

out-on-the-curb ... letting go ... before it's time ...

... ok, so maybe there's a little bit of life left in that one ... 

It's a great story.  And I will tell it ... when I am sure

what it all means ...

Home is where your heart is ... open your heart ...

find your home ...

Run, MJ! Run!

www.lifelessons-mj.blogspot.com

(c)september 2011

Now, Which WAY Do We Go?

Road maps ... are very cool things.  A little archaic ... but still ... very cool. 

When you first get one, it's all folded up nice & neat ... pressed flat ... about the size of a rack card.  Generally, it's the person riding shotgun who gets the privilege ... the challenge ... of unfolding ... and reading the map. 

There's something special about unfolding a map for the very first time.  Untucking ... turning ... fanning out the paper ... until it's spread open ... as wide as the dashboard.

And the person in control of the map is rustling it ... crunching it ... trying very hard not to have his hand up under the nose of the driver ... while trying to manipulate the map down to a manageable size ... attempting to locate ... on the map .... where it is you are ... and where EXACTLY you are trying to go.

Generally, at some point, the map is then re-folded haphazardly ... into a square or a rectangle ... that bears no resemblance to the orginal factory-generated fold.  It's easier that way.  To hide from sight ... all of the other roads ... destinations ... to only look at the littler picture ...

It's less confusing that way.

Upon arrival, the roadmap is then stuffed into the glove compartment unceremoniously ... until the next time directions are needed.  Most likely it isn't even unfolded ... from it's new configuration ... because everyone knows that any attempt to refold the map into it's original, pristine shape would prove to be impossible ... so why bother ...

Those were the days.  The good ole days.  Of roadmaps.  And clear directions.

"Now, which way do we go?", Dorothy asked Toto. (Video link)  At the crossroads ... of the yellow brick road ... AND ... the yellow brick road. Toto, of course, didn't know ... which way to go.

From high up on the pole, the Scarecrow responds ... "Of course, people DO go both ways" ... and, well, we all know what happens next ...
they follow the yellow brick road. 


They didn't have a roadmap. Or any of today's navigational tools ... mapquest, GPS, onstar assistance ...

All they had to rely on was help from the new friends ... who were actually old friends ... they encountered along the way ... and the signs & messages that popped up ... from a variety of sources ... guiding them ...throughout their journey.

Signs & messages are fun.  Almost as fun as roadmap folding. 

Last week I was in Hot Springs ... exploring some possibilities for future projects ... looking for some signs ... as to what was coming next.

I took a little time to visit with a friend ...  that I would love to be working with ... on something.  We were sharing about the "which ways" in our lives ... right now  ... and ... trying to figure out ... why it was ... that sometimes where we want to go isn't really where we seem to be heading .... or something like that ...

He is placing some dreams ... some goals ... some projects ... on the back burner ... because they don't seem to be making sense ... or falling into place ... at the moment.

 ... just a little bit of encouragement ... in that area ... would sure go a long way ... to keeping the faith ... that's what he said ... as he was rushing out the door ... with a promise of a little more time the next day ...

So I moseyed on over to see another friend ...  an old friend ... whose glue gun has been riding around in the trunk of my car ... for a little over two years. During our visit, a random introduction was made ... me to another visitor in his store ... it's too soon to tell ... but I am pretty sure there wasn't anything random about it ... it was very cool ...

The next morning ... I shared the story over coffee ... and my discouraged friend stared at me wide-eyed ... and said, "Wow!  How does something like that happen?" followed by "It's interesting how things like that always happen to you...."

It was a message ... to us both ... of encouragement .... of keeping the faith.

Wandered through the Cracker Barrel gift shop on my way out ... and there was a sign propped up against a counter ... it was a sign, all right ... and a SIGN ....

.

I didn't purchase it ... because it was a little pricey ... for words painted on a board ... figure I will make one of my own ... one of these days ...

Still, the message wasn't lost on me!

Later in the week ... a group of people that I have become close to over the last year ... reached their defining moment ... of a year's worth of work & effort.  You know, that moment when everything that you have done is put to the test ... and you have no way of knowing how things will turn out ... until it's all tallyed up.

Ever had one of those moments?!?! 

You know you've done the right thing ... even when it's hard ... you've made the tough choices ... stuck by your morals & values ... taken a beating or two ... wondering if any of it was really worth it ?!?

And then by the closest of margins ... right prevails.  And you know in an instant ... that either way ... it would have been ok ... with you ... because character really does count.

There was no celebration.  Just back to business as usual. The next day, lunch was brought in ... chicken with garlic sauce ... and a fortune cookie. 

Cracked it open ... and there waiting for me was the SECOND best fortune I have ever received in a cookie from a Chinese restaurant ...

Hallelujah!

A simple message.  Just one word. No doubt it was meant for me.

On the way to a picnic yesterday a text exchange took place between me ... and someone that is important me ... but is not really fitting into my life ... not yet.

At times ... I am prompted to send him a word of encouragement ... it's always specific ... even though I have absolutely no idea what's really going on over there in his life ... the prompting is always so strong that I have no choice but to send the message ... even though it feels silly ... foolish ... awkward ...

So, obediently,  I said what I was prompted to say.  It took a little while ... but eventually he responded.

He:  Thank u !

Me:  For ???

He:  Msg's.

Stunned. And amazed.  I was.

All week I have been pondering on the signs & messages ... the now-which-way-do-we-go's ... and out-of-the-blue ... someone says ... to ME ...
"thanks for the messages!"

It was a humbling ... and an encouragement ... all wrapped up in 10 characters or less ...

Later in the afternoon ... I stood in a circle ... holding hands with two of the most important people in my life ... in a beautiful place ... surrounded by virtual strangers ... and we all prayed ... together ... outloud ...

Our Father

Who art in heaven

Hallowed be Thy name ...

Knowing full well that 6 p.m. was going to roll around ... and even though it was May 21, 2011 ... we were ALL going to be "left behind" ....

We were "raptured" ... nonetheless ...

That's right.  We were.  Looked it up.  Just to be sure. Either definition works for me.

rapture:

a: a state or experience of being carried away by overwhelming emotion   

b: a mystical experience in which the spirit is exalted to a knowledge of divine things 

The Bible is full of stories where God says He's going to do something ... and then when He does exactly what He said He was going to do ... it doesn't look anything at all like what the people of the day thought it was going to look like ...

So even though I know that the Bible clearly states that no man will know the day or the hour of Christ's return ... who's to say ... that RAPTURE isn't already taking place ...

... and just not visible ... to our human eyes ...

... maybe it's taking place in our hearts ... right now ...

... it's our souls, after all ... that He's after ... not our physical bodies. 

Rounding out this amazing week ... Iit seems that the little bear has been talking outloud again.  (Read the story, Bear Hugs) This time ... he wasn't talking to me.  Still, it's hard to dispute the message ....
I love you THIS much!

Fourteen times in an hour.  That's what was reported to me. 

He's been sitting there on the shelf ... in that room ... for months ... waiting for exactly the right time ... to offer up  his hope & encouragement. 

One thing's for certain ... He's persistent.  When He is pursuing a relationship with you ... a relationship that will allow you to have your whole heart back. 

Open your heart ... Hear His voice ... He's talking to you ... it's personal ... once you begin to hear His voice nothing in your life will ever be the same ... again.

How many times do you have to be told you are LOVED before you get it ... before you allow yourself to feel it ?!?  If fourteen times isn't enough ... I am pretty sure that the message will come around again ... when you least expect it ... when you need it the most.

Now which WAY do we go?

Doesn't really matter if we have a roadmap ... or a GPS ... or compass ... as long as we listen with our hearts ... as long we are paying attention to the signs & messages along the way ... as long as we are willing to walk awhile with others who share our road ... as long as we hold hands with friends, old & new, as we pray for direction ...

Just follow the yellow brick road ... it's the road that leads to nowhere ... it's the road that leads you home ... doesn't matter which WAY ... really ... it doesn't ... because every road takes you to where it is you are going ... eventually.

I love you THIS much!

It's a way of life ...

Hallelujah!

www.lifelessons-mj.blogspot.com
(c) May 2011



A Voice From The Past ...

Yesterday morning ... very, very early ... Jessi had gotten up to fix her sausage biscuit.  She pushed the start button on the microwave and amdist the routine hum came the message:

I love you THIS much !!!



Startled, I said to Mary Hall, "Did you hear THAT?!?!"  Sound asleep, she mumbled, "WHAT?!?  It's just the microwave." 

In a couple of minutes the house was still & quiet again as Jessi & I went about our morning routines ... and Mary Hall slept.

I love you THIS much !!!

Clear & true ... no mistaking the voice ... the words hung in the air ...

"Did you hear IT?",  I prodded her again. 

"Yes, MJ, I did."

Amazing, it was simply amazing.  And 6 times in the next hour the little bear shared it's message ... having sat silently on the piano in the living room for the last 6 months.  There was no rhythm or pattern to it's speech. 

Sometimes the sentiment was repeated in quick succession ... IloveyouTHISmuch.IloveyouTHISmuch ... followed by long pauses and then the simple statement deliberately spoken ... outloud.

If you aren't familiar with the little bear and it's message ... it first spoke to us during the filming of STEP AWAY FROM THE STONE (March 30, 2010 post "Bear Hugs).

A little stunned ... yet somehow not totally surprised ... I retrieved the bear from it's perch on the piano.  You know, trying to figure out what triggered it ... TODAY ... after such a long silence.

By design, it only speaks when it's arms are pulled apart ... widespread ... inviting you into a friendly embrace ...

As if to say, step a little closer ... come on in ... it's ok to be open ...

I showed Mary Hall ... as I did earlier in the year ... how there was no way it could be a short in it's mechanism ... or  a battery running down ... how you had to literally pull the arms apart to make it talk to you ...

She said, "Are you sure?" 

Well, yeah, I'm SURE ...

I showed her ... again ...

How it worked .

Gently, she took the little bear from me.  And after a few attempts, she squeezed the little bear and it's arms popped open ... on it's own ...

Ohhhhh ... that's how it's supposed to work ...

You can make it talk to you by pulling it's arms apart ... deliberately demanding it to speak ... on cue ...

But, truth is, it was designed to respond to a touch ... in a special place ... firm, consistent contact persuades the little bear to respond naturally ... on it's own ...

The message is the same ... either way ... right?!?

Then my horoscope stated "The love and support of others should really help to boost your self-confidence today."  It went on to say I shouldn't be afraid to take a few chances.

That's what I've been doing.  Experimenting in vulnerability ... in what I thought was a safe, controlled environment ... where the outcome was predictable ... only to find, once again, that things aren't really as they seem ... or ever easy ...

At least not for me.

A few chances ... that 's what it said, MJ ... don't become discouraged or give up too soon ... take a FEW chances.

Validation followed ... in the cosmic words of The Universe:

" ... much love from your invisible friends .."

My invisible friends ... my visible friends ... offering their encouragement & support ... as I wander down this new path ... vulnerability.

A day or two ago, I received a lovely bejeweled turtle from my friends who recently joined their lives.  With a warm note reminding me that it's ok ... it's time ... for me to stick my neck out ... to quit cozying up inside my protective shell ... to allow someone else to catch a glimpse of the real ME inside ...

After all, it was there ... in their side yard ... on the eve of their wedding ... that my turtle stopped me in my tracks ... touching me in a special way ... gently pressing me to open up ... naturally ... on my own ...

I love you THIS Much!!!

... ok, I am wrong. 

And Mary Hall's right.

It's important. 

And I slowly but surely ... I am getting it.

http://www.lifelessons-mj.blogspot.com/

(c) Mary Jane Sawyer, 2010